Some people are great about finding the positive in any situation and telling you about it. They are the types of bosses, coworkers, teachers, and friends who will give you some constructive criticism while pointing out everything you’ve done right, even if the project or situation turns out to be a total mess. You want to seek them out, because they will lift you up when you need a boost.
And You Probably Know a Few “Eyores” Too!
Then there are people who can’t give a compliment without also pointing out your shortcomings. They tend to focus on the negative in any situation and eagerly share the bad news with you. These people can be hard to live and work with, right? The big question is what type of person are you and how do you think and communicate about your life and your surroundings.
If increased happiness is your goal (and I hope it is, by this point in the Challenge!), I suggest you work on making sure you think and communicate in a positive way. Why is thinking important? Because it is how we communicate with ourselves. I don’t know about you, but I’d much rather spend my time becoming my biggest cheerleader than my worst critic. Yes, you’re going to make mistakes – you’re human. The trick: don’t beat yourself up, do learn from the mistake, and move on with your best foot forward.
Step by Step
Here’s the good news: how you think and how you communicate can be learned and unlearned. If you’re a bit of a pessimist right now, you can learn to think, be, and talk in a more positive way. Of course learned behaviors and habits aren’t always easy to change. Step one is that you have to want to change. Step two is to learn to recognize your behavior as it happens. Be aware, listen to the thoughts going through your head and pay attention to how they make you feel. Step three, stop and make yourself think before you speak. Step four is rinse and repeat. And that’s really all there is to it. Noticing how you feel when you talk to yourself indicates how positive or negative your self-talk is; if you can monitor that, the rest is easy!
Take a few minutes to reflect on how you have been thinking today. Think back on conversations you’ve had with others and get a feel for how you communicate with yourself and others. Are you as positive as you’d like to be, or is there room for improvement? If so, start implementing the simple four step process I shared with you and keep practicing until this more positive way of thinking and communicating has become a strong new habit. It will have a big impact in your own happiness and that of those around you.